I never had a deep sleep since I can recall when was the last one. I just had one tonight. It felt short but I feel well-rested. I snoozed my alrm on my mobile phone a couple of times stealing a few more minutes to cuddle in my sofa bed, hugging my cool pillow.

It was raining since last night. Wow.

Today should be our last day of work for the week. Yesterday afternoon, we purchased our bus ticket for our team’s vacation after 5 years of work. Tonight we leave and have our deserved break.

Well, rain or shine we will push through with the trip. I’ve packed my stuff last night and like in any otherout of town trip I had, I always go for 2 luggages: 1 for my clothes and 1 for my gadgets: Biggie my mighty Powerbook, my Canon G5 and other stuff that I think I might need.

Still raining outside. I have a few errands to make before I go to work then from there we head off straight to the bus station.

This is it. Yeah!

Rain never stops. Hope that won’t stop us from our long-awaited vacation. It WON’T stop us. There’s a big chance that the weather here in Manila is the same as to where we are heading. May it be just hanging out in our rooms, watch downloaded TV series till my head ached and my eyes popped out or just sleep the whole day till my back hurts, I’m still up for it. Even if it will be that way, I’m just glad we are NOT in Manila for a few days.

See you in a few days… when I get back online

Lunes na naman bukas. Ibig sabihin luluwas na naman ako ng Manila. Pag luluwas ako, ibig sabihin nu’n maaga na naman kasi tanghaliin ka lang ng konti o abutan ng rush hour – patay! Pahirapan sa pagsakay. Para kang sardinas sa latang di pa nabubuksan. 

Alam ko na naman ang scenario kada Lunes. Kaya madalas Linggo palang ng hapon on gabi lumuluwas na ako. Hindi naman ‘yung ang reklamo ko.

Luluwas ako kasi magtatrabaho na naman ulit.

Hindi naman sa ayaw ko ‘yung trabaho ko. Well, ako ayos naman. Hindi nga lang pa rin maintindihan ng karamihan ‘yung ginagawa ko. Para kasi sa “karamihan” pag nagtatrabaho ka dapat 8am-5pm, nakaapustura at yumayaman. 9am to 6pm naman kami kaso minsan extended pati weekends, no OT pay. Dati ok lang sa akin, ngayon…. Hmmm… sabihin na lang natin na pagod na ako at sawa na sa pagiging mabait… or rather, tawag ng “karamihan” sa amin – TANGA.

Simple lang naman e. Gusto ko ‘yung ginagawa ko. Well, basta naman gusto mo madaling simulan, gawin o ituloy.

Basta kung gusto mo.

Kaso lately, nakakawala ng gana. Sawa na ba ako? I don’t think so naman. Sabi baka daw kasi parang pagkain ‘yung scenario, puro pansit bihon na lang. What if mag-miki naman daw ako o canton. Hellow?!? Pansit pa rin! Ewan!

After 3 (official) years, makakapagbakasyon na ang grupo. Kung tutuusin, 5 taon na pala mula ng sinimulan ng boss mula pa nung soloista pa s’ya. Masasara ang tindahan ng 2 araw, pero 4 na araw kaming mapapahinga dahil pati Sabado at Linggo magkakasama kami.

Bakasyon.

Pahinga.

Walang trabaho.

DAPAT.

Sana naman nga. Bakasyon kami. WALANG MANG-IISTORBO. UTANG NA LOOB.

Excited ako usually kapag ganitong out of town, lalo pa kung grupo at talagang bibiyahe at bagong lugar pupuntahan ko. Pero sa totoo lang, hindi ako excited. Kasi kapag nangyari na naman ang naiisip ko, tama na naman ako s’yempre. Pero BAKA magwala na ako this time. So may God, mapa-kung anumang relihiyon ‘yun, forbid na mag-flare up ako at masagad-sagad na.

May sumira na kasi ng birthday celebration ko dati. Napatawad ko na ba? Ewan ko. Pero kung sa pagkalimot, obviously, hindi ko makali-kalimutan. Elephant ako e: may forgive but will never forget. Sa’n kaya nagsimula ‘yung quote na ‘yun? Swak na swak e.

‘Yun lang. Nakakatamad. Hihilahin ko na naman ang sarili ko sa pagbangon bukas ng umaga.

Haaay…

Pero sabi nga nila, pessimistic attitude ko strikes again…

*magdarasal*

Lord,

Alam ko po na hindi naman ako perpektong tao. May ino-okray din ako kahit ‘di naman ako kagandahan. Nagmumura at malamang makakapatay din ng tao (sooner or later). Kung may mag ibang tao ayaw magkamali, parang this time I pray na sana mali ang inaasahan kong magyayari sa bakasyon naming darating. Sana mag-enjoy naman kami at walang mang-istorbo. Respeto po ang hiling namin. Na hindi naman naibibigay sa araw-araw na humihinga po kami. Pero kahit po sa “bakasyon” namin meron. Kasi ibig pong sabihin may pag-asa pa ‘di ba? *kindat*

Sana po ipagkaloob n’yo itong munting kahilingan ko. Mas madali po ito ah, kesa sa mga dating kong dasal na sana ma-in love sa akin si *toot* o magka-BF na ako. ‘Di lang naman po ako ang masisiyahan kundi pati ang mga kagrupo ko at mga inaanak at pamilya ng boss-friend ko. Kahit po alam kong pag-uwi namin at pagbabalik sa Manila, ratratan na naman po at balik sa realidad.

‘Yun lang po. Marami pong salamat, Lord.

Amen.

I just finished watching this movie…

It’s English translated title is Love of Siam. It’s a Thai movie. I learned it from Gian, my friend who’s assigned to work in Bangkok, Thailand.

I have been watching this movie since last week… watching it almost every night… over and over again…

And still cry again and again…

There’s some urge in me to hear it’s songs too. I searched over youtube.com and was luck enough to find some and marked it as one of my favorites.

You might see that it looked like an ordinary teen romance movie but wait till you see one fan tribute to the movie. Check out the link by clicking here. It tackles more than what close-minded critics just see it.

Personally, I guess Thailand has some special place in my heart. And seeing this Thai movie, plus another form of unrequited love did the “magic” of pressing my fragile spot.

At least there’s one thing I can relate to all these that’s happening to me these past few days. 

The only definite thing.

A word that probably can describe me right now.

Blank to recount my mind. I don’t know what write or how to write it. The past days I have certain thoughts but somehow I am restraining to release it… or just really don’t know how to put it in words.

I am no writer.

Blank to describe how I feel. I don’t want to get up and open my eyes. Just want to sleep or let the days past.

Woke up early today and just rolled over the bed a couple of times forcing myself to doze off again. But I have to get up.

Routine.

Times you don’t care, you wouldn’t care and you feel no one cares. I guess that’s was it. When you reach the limit. That limit of unexplainable? I wouldn’t care. I guess…

Blank.

Careless.

Empty.

I got this “test” from Apple’s blog. Took it and it’s true! Described me well Ü Read on and hopefully you’d take the test yourself …

————

Good-natured Realists are warm-hearted, helpful personalities. They do their work conscientiously and have a pronounced organising talent. They often feel they are committed to traditional values. The family in particular is extremely important to Good-natured Realists. Their greatest pleasure is making themselves useful and taking care of other people. But they do not like pushing themselves to the fore; they prefer to fulfill their tasks out of the limelight. Good-natured Realists are real workaholics; they are very reliable and nothing is too much for them when it is a question of completing a project. Thoroughness, conscientiousness and sense of duty are their strongest points. They prefer established and familiar situations to new and unknown situations.

In dealing with others, Good-natured Realists are considerate and obliging; they are always happy to put aside their own requirements in the interest of their family and friends. Their home is mostly very well cared-for, cosy and tidy. Their perfectionism on the one hand and their aversion to delegating tasks on the other hand often lead to them taking on too much both professionally and privately. They cannot stand discord; conflicts make them very unhappy. One could almost describe them as being harmony-addicted - and this sometimes leads them to strongly neglecting themselves and their own wishes because they are unable to bring themselves to put up a fight.

Good-natured Realists dream of a stable and trusting relationship for life. Marriage and family are very important to them. They take care of their partner attentively and lovingly and put up with a lot for a harmonious relationship. They are also loyal and reliable friends. However, they can be very hurt if their interpersonal commitment is taken for granted for too long.

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Adjectives which describe your type

introverted, practical, emotional, planning, tradition-conscious, good-natured, self-sacrificing, caring, devoted, friendly, loyal, considerate, reliable, conscientious, loving, quiet, reserved, modest, helpful, objective, hard-working, warm-hearted, communicative, painstaking, altruistic

These subjects could interest you

cooking, animals, family, music, trekking, camping, hiking, craftwork, nature, drawing/painting, astrology, spiritual matters, meditation

A week has past from the trip and the “fever” that I acquired from it.

Posted my photos in Multiply and as days passed it seemed hard for me to sort out the photos and files for personal archiving and for re-posting to those other social websites.

Other projects wanted to outdo the other. As if fighting to get my attention, well, my priority actually… from re-doing a box diecut, re-sizing a countertop display and digging up archived file for a quite old project just to name a few

The Bangkok video greeting setup for the client seemed to be working since I don’t receive any emails, IMs or SMS from Gian on inquiries or problems on it. That’s a good sign Ü But I remind myself on each day that ends, videos to animate accumulates :-S

No word from Ten and I feel a bit sad that Put didn’t reply in my messages through SMS and MSN

A sign that everyone’s busy. Everyone’s back on their individual lives.

Reality.

I have a couple to things in mind to blog. Both has something to do with Bangkok and my trip there. And some, well, quite personal. But I sort of lost the interest of writing them. I don’t know. Lately, I just feel being slowed down and held back.

Sigh.

Repeating a post of this strip because…

I dedicate this comic strip to my dear friend Gian and (again) to my kumpareng Myles… as the Charlie Brown(s).

May your Lucy(s) be happy in making you miserable or hurting you, BUT may their conscience bombard them one way or another.

As another person said… “Ang karma ngayon, FedEx na. Door to door delivery, may next day service pa!” Well, the Lucy(s) karma might not be bestowed upon tomorrow on them but surely it will come.

And as I remind you and myself as well…

Blessed are they who suffer persecution for justice sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Remind yourself you are the Charlie Browns and who are the Lucys:

Charlie Brown is the lead star of the Peanuts comic strip. And in every movie, strip or story, if there’s a lead there’s the villain, kontrabida or simply put, those who wanted the spotlight to be theirs. They are the pa-cute, papansin, the pathetic, the frustrated lead star.

Imagine, you are the Charlie Brown, lead role bestowed on you because of your character and the Lucys, well, will always be the same as they are created to highlight more of your character

Go, Charlie Browns!!!

That’s life… in a comic strip

Got back to my post in our office after a week-long assignment in Bangkok… before I post anything here, I’d like to dedicated this Peanuts strip to my boss-friend and kumpareng Myles…

Ikaw ang naalala ko sa katauhan ni Linus… fill in the character that Lucy impersonates here…

Hihihi…

And I am now back to reality…

That’s odd. From the time I seated in the call-in cab my tummy’s reacting weird. Am I having butterflies in my stomach or just typical gas reacting quite weird? Perhaps it’s hunger. It’s almost 8pm and I didn’t take any snacks that day. Finishing errands and doing last minute packing. I hate this day. All seemed going wrong. Really. As Gian last Ym-ed me, the only best thing that’s happening is that I’ll be going there and seeing him and Ten… yup, just the two of them.

What else can go wrong today? It was a quite miserable Wednesday.

I reached the airport exactly 2 hours before my designated flight. Remembering how it was the last time I went there, it has some “slight” changes: they gave the entrance a clean, well-lighted look. But other than that, nothing’s new.

Still hours before boarding, I tried looking around the waiting area for food. Well, decent food. Despite the fact that it’s surely pricey, at least it’s decent. After two  rounds, I still haven’t seen anything interesting. I have to eat something. Until in a corner with less people I found a store that sells some sweets and… noodles!!!

Dinner served: I think it’s Vietnamese noodles with 2 small beef I’ve eaten already and one bottle of mineral water that I saved till I reached my destination.

I wasn’t able to instructed the Cebu Pacific attendant to put me by the window, but thank God she did. Unfortunately, I am seated beside 2 young couples. I call them young because they acted that way and the guy, quite loud for his age. Later on I found out, a balikbayan. Just as I expected… mayabang at mahanging amboy. Behind me I think are gay couples, one of which kept on singing “Umbrella”…

Plese close the plane doors, I speak in my head. I just want to go and this over with

Wow! What a time not to bring my old and dusty iPod mini. Reminded myself, 2 hours of flight isn’t long. I’ve endured 18 hours of flight why can’t this one.

But the fun was just starting…

Just as the plane was about to take off, a funny noise was heard… what the f—k? The pilot seemed to try it again, 2nd time, 3rd time… the sound was like when you step on your car breaks it didn’t pass smoothly. Something like that. Then when I looked outside, I think one of the thingies on the right wing was not moving smoothly.

Then the pilot announces… they have “minor” technical problems and might cause the flight be delayed for about 30minutes. Oh boy… this will be the longest flight of my life…

I have not experienced riding a car being towed but now, I can perhaps put in my list of experienced things and cross it out: rode a plane being towed in the flight pad.

As the plane was being towed, the amboy started to tell stories of the flight he had with Cebu Pacific when one of it’s propeller stopped while in flight. Hearing that, I gave him a stern and sharp look. He stopped blabbing for awhile. I hope he got the message.

Who in the right f—king mind would talk about that while on a plane about to take off and has some trouble? ARGH! And thanks to him, the gay couple seemed to picked it up and started talking about some similar story? What?!? I am NOT hearing this… do these people even know where the hell are the propellers located in an airplane.

We have to transfer plane. Waited for almost an hour. Had to walk from gate 10 to gate 3, end to end of the airport.

A few minutes of peace. At times I appreciate being alone.

2 hours of flight was indeed longer. I had a few interrupted naps. What would you expect from a low-cost flight? But I am grateful for such flight. Because if not for that I don’t think I’ll be riding a plane heading for Bangkok. They may curse Cebu Pacific for their services but I salute them… really. They made Asian countries quite near and travelling efficient…. Well, minus the annoying passengers of course.

I envisioned a very impressive and pleasant Suvarnabhumi Airport that I am about to see then. And Gian, perhaps Ten also at the arrival gates. Texted him to inform that I’m already there, I noticed the time in my mobile phone, it’s a few minutes past 1AM… I felt relieved.

Well, feeling lousy, tired and I think some hair at the back of my head are standing still standing up, I walked towards the gates. Felt the cool aircon of the airport…. I am definitely in Bangkok! I saw my reflections by the glass window and it has been perhaps a habit of everyone to fix themselves, I stroke and tried to fix my hair. I saw passengers perhaps of the flight we disembarked from. Long-wait to their faces. I still feel floaty, that feeling you have when ride a roller coaster… light and floaty.

Then when my eyes reached the gates, I saw a familiar face. But it didn’t register to me until he smiled… Oh my… I think my voice was really loud that some co-passengers looked back. All I said was, “Hey! What are you doing here? Aren’t you suppose to be by 5 today?” He smiled. Welcomed me and reached out his hand for a handshake.

I am surprised. Stunned. I could have killed with his smile and if I have a bad heart I could have a heart attack there. Of course, I’m just exaggerating…

That placed a smile on my face. Odd smile that I hard can’t remove until I saw Gian and Ten at the arrival area. Hugged them both assured that I’m safe, not dreaming and is indeed in Bangkok.

It’s over. It’s already Thursday. Wednesday is definitely over.

They always say that love is lovelier the second time around… can that saying be also applied to a place you fell in love with?

Tonight is my flight to Bangkok. The city I fell in love the first time I’ve been there. I’m excited and at the same time scared as mentioned in one of my previous entry. While I was in the cab off to the airport, I don’t feel well that as if I have some morning sickness, like I want to vomit. And my stomach was somewhat contracting when I saw the lights of NAIA.

Why am I having the jitters when it’s my second time in the land of smiles? I don’t recall having the same feeling during my first trip there. Perhaps it’s what happening today that really quite affected me. I had to finish some projects before I leave for Bangkok and concentrate most of my energy and strength there. I even had a few burst of kasungitan that my team got affected. Me being Miss Minchin again Good thing we are all ok before I went to the airport.

Haaayyy… what pressure can do to a person. It builds you or eats you up…

*whispers to self* Lord, please make things better. Give me a clear mind to be alert, think things with preciseness and physical strength to endure and cope with the challenges that may come our way. Thank you.

Now my flight is being called. I guess we are about to board in a few minutes. Next entry, I’ll be breathing Bangkok air Ü

Land of Smiles, get ready for Batgirl