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One Day Event

26 Jul

Kung may mga kantang tulad ng “Sana Dalawa Ang Puso Ko” at “Isang Linggong Pag-ibig”, meron na bang kantang nagsasabing nahulog ang loob mo sa pinakamaikling panahon?

Is it possible to fall in love on someone or something for just a day?

Hmmm…

Wala lang… naisip ko lang na baka nga may kanta para sa ganoong scenario.

I did fell in love with this man from our client’s office. Well, up to now, hindi pa rin ako sigurado kung love nga ba ‘yun o init lang ng katawan. Whatever that is, wala rin naman akong napala. Kahit first base man lang. Whatever that means. He was just there in a not so right time. Siguro hinubong ko lang ang sarili ko na siya na nga. Thinking that we are of the same situation, (almost) the same principles, almost the same birthday and pareho kaming mahilig sa mga bata. But here I am still getting hurt or affected pa rin kapag I get to learn he ask this girl out, or harap-harapan siyang nakikipaglandian sa ibang babae samantalang nakaupo lang naman ako sa likuran ng kotse n’ya. Oh, and for the record that he’s doing that, alam n’ya that I kinda like him.

I perhaps created a fictional world for me to enjoy and be happy around this guy being my knight in shining armor and me as the princess in distress, trapped in the tower. Yet now, the tower starts to crumble. Or better yet, it has no lock after all. I pretty much can just open the door and go down the stairs! Well, it is I who should destroy what I built, right?

It’s no fairy tale, nor a happy ending.

Maglumandi s’ya kung kanino. Nabuhay ako at mas tahimik pa nga dati nung wala siya, ba’t hindi ngayon di ba?

Bitter Ocampo?! Sabi sa akin ng friends ko. Bitter na kung bitter. Napahiya ako e, disappointed. Ang plastic ko naman kung ngingiti pa ako di ba? May mga moments pa rin na tanga at gaga pa rin ako sa kanya. Lalo na may sungit moments din. Let me recover naman. As much as I wanted na sana isang sukahan na lang o parang umutot ka lang tapos wala na yung kabag sa tiyan mo, hindi ganu’n-ganu’n lang eh. Somehow may latak pa ring maiiwan di ba? May konting natitira sa sistema mo. Pero in due time, malilinis na rin. Sana merong parang Diatabs o Kremil-S na gamot para sa isang dignified recovery. (Plugging ba ito?)

Kahit papano, I feel I am recovering naman. Bumabawi na. Sabi nga bilis naman daw mag-bounce back (sa taba ko daw kasi) Hahaha! Fine! Mataba na kung mataba, papayat din ako noh. Sana. Anyway, balik sa naunang tanong: Is is possible to fall in love in the most shortest time? Kababawan di ba? Pero siguro, humanga lang ako pansamantala. Oo nga, I used this poor kid perhaps to get over that man in the other office. I used in the sense that I didn’t hurt anyone naman… bad ‘yun! ‘Yoko makarma noh. Door to door na ngayon at next day delivery na kaya ang karma!

Nakakatuwa lang. He helps me in a way na maka-recover or ma-divert ang utak ko. Pero hindi nga possible. Bakit?

1.) Di ko naman talaga siya type. Way out of the Orlando Bloom, Jake Gyllenhaal at Collin Farrel ideology ko. ‘Wag na kumontra, pangarap nga eh. Libre lang ‘yun. Di ko kayo pinakikialaman ha?!

2.) I am old. Really OLD. And just the other day, I helped him out pa yata to realize na ang bata pa pala n’ya. Wow. I never dream of being a cradle snatcher, nor be in a May-December affair. Uso na nga daw ‘yun, but then again, hindi ako sumasabay sa mga uso. EVER.

3.) May sabit na siya. It’s a big deal for me. Although minsan may evilness na bumubulong sa akin na kasamaan na once in my life, I’d be a mistress or destroy a relationship… pero hindi ko kaya. As in. Lalo kapag pinagdidiinan na “mahal na mahal” n’ya.

In fairness, bibigyan ko na lang ng award ‘yung batang ‘yun. Sana nga tunay lahat nung pinapakita n’ya. His girlfriend would have been very lucky. What more kung magiging asawa na n’ya.

Timing was good siguro, in helping me get over the other one. But the scenario is quite bad, and the person? Lalo pa. Kataon lang, araw-araw mo katabi, nakikita, halos nakakasabay umuwi. Pero hindi rin. Nah. Hindi ko kaya. I am the writer of my own life. This is not a new chapter. Corny.

Nagkataon lang nga siguro.

If I may say this, it’s the wrong man, at a wrong place and definitely a wrong time.

And there’s no such thing as falling for a day or even fell for a day. Nagkataon lang… uulitin ko pa ulit… nagkataon lang. Pero kung pag-iisipan. Imbento lang e. Over analyzed.

As in OA.

Snapped back to reality, dear!

And besides, ayoko sa laging late.

 
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Posted by on July 26, 2007 in Realizations, Tagalog Naman, Wala lang...

 

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