What happened last night could have been a follow through of what happened, the other night (as the stated in my previous entry). What happened last night made me think to that extent that it gave some verification to myself… my worthiness.
I may have entered into a situation that should have been avoided from the start. Never mix water w/ oil, if I may say so. Shake it vigorously, the substance may look mixed up but at the end it will still separate. Avoid hassle of cleaning it up.
Wounds may heal for some time and most of it leave scars… to remind us of where it came from and why we had that wound. I guess now, verifying where I stand and trying to understand certain situations and people lead me to understand myself and honestly, knocked the helmet off of my head.
I came to my senses. I am not so love struck that I have lost my sense of reality and self-worth.
I still have a little something of myself left.
Learned a lot here. I wish I’ll be reminded of the events I’ve been through. Lessons are quite learned and remembered specially when your trip face flat on the floor. What matter is how you get up, straighten your clothes and brush the dirt off and move on. It hurts. I can’t deny that. But that feeling is so worth it. At lest it has some use. Charge it to experience, as they say. What didn’t kill you makes you stronger… TRUE enough.
I’ve changed a lot. Some doesn’t like it, because it didn’t favor them. Others said it was good. But for me, I feel better. I just feel sad and afraid that I may have lose someone. But it’s up to him. I’ve always made it a point that I’m always there for him but right now, I just have to leave some for myself. I have proven my loyalty but it doesn’t mean I have abandon him. I’ll always be here as a friend. He should have known that from the start.
No hard feelings.