… then I should be happy by now.
I am. At least if not totally.
I lost my chance to tell this male friend of mine how I feel about him before. That very same statement that should be the door of opportunity for me back then opened a few minutes ago.
I finally told him that I kinda like him… that’s why I am so affected by what is happening between him and a certain girl and whatever it is in connection with him. And that how I said it was underrated. Because I used kinda. Darn!
I do like him, or even went beyond it. But expounding or nurturing it is really foolish enough of me. I was as good as turned down of course.
But as I intended and planned this before (that never occurred back then) “professing” how I feel is to set me free and have my peace. I did have it now that it’s out of my chest. I never intend to win his heart, that would just be a bonus if ever. The worst of his reaction was to avoid me or lose the friendship that we have but it didn’t happened. Could it be that it didn’t happen because I told him over YM, and it’s unplanned? Still, he is the man that I thought he is back then, the person that I like… he may be a joker at times but he always will be a gentleman and a profound person specially when drunk! Hahaha!
I was a bit shaking when we are conversing over YM. And I’m a bit shaken until now. Today was such a long tiring day. I thought your reaction over it will keep me up and work on my illustrating stint. Now, I am sleepy. My body gave in to its natural circulation…
Thanks for just being yourself and taking this well. We’ll still be seeing each other and probably work together again someday. Hopefully, time will come we’ll both just be laughing at this.
I have my double stuffed Oreo pack and a cold glass of milk to “celebrate” this occasion. I am pretending there. They were more of my comfort companions at this time.
A toast (of icy cold milk) to those souls that need to be freed…
and the show must go on… moving on…
Me, Myself And Perhaps Others As Well 
Faye Ilogon
May 25, 2007 at 8:33 am
It’s always better to live for five minutes than die for fifty years. I applaud your bravery and your pure heart. I wasn’t half as wise as you when I was your age. I am bowled over by how your sweetness has stayed with you despite disappointments or other travails. Don’t be sad. Let’s chat over lotsa nice food with the Diva one of these days. My treat. So I can finally shake your hand. Live well and live without fear.
Nemcy
May 26, 2007 at 10:49 am
Hi, Faye! It was my great pleasure that a well-renowned writer such as you read and even commented to my blog! I am overwhelmed. Thank you so much. You’re right. That 5-minutes is worth it. After that conversation, we haven’t seen each other but we still YM and talked over the phone, work topic of course. I am sad at the moment, not because of this but of other cause. But I will be fine. Thanks to you, the Diva and other supportive friends.
Looking forward to meet you, Faye! Btw, I bought a copy of “Heartbreaks” when I saw your name on it and finished reading it in one sitting! Jose mentioned it to me but didn’t register then. I admire how you write. I wonder where you get you ideas in writing… GALING!!!
Faye Ilogon
May 27, 2007 at 5:58 am
Arffff. Nemcy you make my live expand! Hehehe. I am not well-renowned yet or else I’d be asked to do a sanitary napkin commercial like KC Concepcion. In this town, you ain’t famous until you’ve been a sanitary napkin or Eskinol image model. Hehehe.
Basta when I get my paycheck in June (it’s kinda delayed), let’s eat somewhere nice with the Diva. It’s a ritual I do when I want to exact revenge on delayed payments. Hehehe.
Where I get my ideas? Well, I get them after listening to cheesy songs like “What Good is a Heart?” by Code Red. Hehehe. That’s the truth.
Faye Ilogon
May 27, 2007 at 5:59 am
Er, that’s “liver” instead of “live.” Hehehe. I get excited when I type.